I am carrying a bag full of mixed emotions
Do you want to help me carry it until I reach the finish line?
Silence makes the loudest noise
Where there is light, the darkness always interferes
the compatibility carries the truth
The future carries the burden of the past.
Problems are like shoes we wish to fit
Have you found the right size?
In the middle of nowhere, somewhere
Relinquish with hatred
Comforted by numbness,
Heart pumping blood of melancholy
Taken back by his ignorance
Disgusted by his pretence
Hate cannot explain the resentment I feel for him
His presence is overdressed with so much agony
I don’t know whether I could forgive him.
He had become a repressed memory I do not want to remember nor bring out through the unconscious
If I had a pistol manufactured by intelligent men who knows how to hypnotise a person into believing that there’s no purpose of living.
I am wounded by his persistence towards making me angry
Forcing me to confront the beast that lives inside me
I thought I have put it to sleep
You get the pleasure from dictating my emotions
Adorning my soul with bitterness.
Deceived to believe that I am in charge
Unfiltered thoughts of hostility torture me
Take away my inner peace.
Oh God teach us to forgive those who hurt us
They do not know what they are doing.
Stand accused within the strangeness of my own skin,
Inflicted with troubling thought that sought to kill the sedate feeling locked inside,
Addicted to a pill that takes away my patience,
Standing in the pathway, waiting to attack the beast with sweet love pretence,
The pill sedate my soul with hostility
I stand accused in the middle of nowhere…
Locked within the iron cage with the pain I cannot bear,
Rest easy upon the realness of my scars hidden, trapped inside my heart.
He assume that I am fine with everything
His presence makes me cold and bitter,
He is playing a dangerous game with the devil
Though he is a God fearing man
Hope that his prayers protect his soul because he failed to honour his part of the deal,
The strangeness of my own being soothe the guilt trip which burden my serenity with heartache,
Voices that echoes within the night intend to keep me restless,
He carry on with his mission…attacking when I am vulnerable
Torturing my innocence with hostility.
Hatred is his closet friend
He is brutalised with pretence
Do you realised the damage you have done
You have sucked my free spirited soul so dry
Left me in the dark,
Battered with empty words
Felt useless and distance from reality.
His abiding indifference will help him find peace in his grave of infidelities
He claims he knows what I really need
Then again he is just a reckless player in a chess game
He allows his opponent to learn his next move,
He is foolish…its absurd to think that he can ne moral
Let his shortcomings flourish and comfort him through his unknown journey.
I stand accused of the crime I didn’t commit
Gave a defence which is entrenched with the truthfulness of his dealings
Yet the fear of challenging him scares me
Someone will get hurt when I start unpacking his luggage of secrecy
His true nature will remain unknown because I chose to die with his secrets
Let him get judged by his own God…not me
Finding myself 