I have left my doors open.
Cold wind sneaking in like a mice.
Carrying the gift of peace and distraction.
I have forgotten your warm embrace
Your charming smile.
You are just a faceless beast
Consumed with an appetite of my blood.
He carved his claws on my flesh
Awakening the deep sited desire of my fantasies.
Captivated by his luring spell
Fabricated underneath the sheet of deception.
Your pleasant scent that lingers through the room
Slowly fades away when you go back to live your other life.
Don’t beg me to conceal all the scars you have left on my skin.
There are sacred portrayals of our moments
An omen of what is meant to be….
In this particular love and war union.
I chose to love you with all your imperfections.
Behind closed doors…pleasure escalates to the peak
We indulge in cardiovascular activities.
Body sweating…heated bodies.
Commanding us to submit to the language of motion
Enslaved with deep darkest longings.
We danced to our own music
Sadly our wildest dream carries the burden of the past
Disguising the present with lies
Denying that the dark shadow of our bitter sweet secrets will haunt us in the future.
The burning desire to write forever torment your soul.
Dragged you through the ground until you admit that you are infected.
Infected with a disease which torture your silence.
Commanding thy self to stain all the blank pages with ink.
You are tired to think….tired to write
slowly rehabilitating thy self with destructions.
Refusing to the listen to the request made by the master.
Pushing afar the burning desire which forever makes you dillussional.
Leaving your soul in great hunger.
Writing is your contentment,
Dont forget the hand that feeds you.
Repressed memories banging violently unto the door of your thoughts.
Forcing you to remember the forgotten memories,
Reawakening all your human senses.
Allowing you to revive the actual ecstasy of writing,
the adrenaline rush which ooze through your blood veins.
Leading you to all sort of places.
Perfection was a taboo….seeing the imagery was very fulfilling.
You have lost the joy of peacefulness
Your thoughts are in constant turmoil.
Tell those murmuring voices inside your head to quieten down.
Making demands in order to be heard.
Keeping you restless and leaving you confused.
Taking charge, pushing, resisting until you surrender.
I AM EXPERIENCING WRITERS BLOCK….. #sad #confused #thoughts_warfare #darkest_place
He said let me peak through your nudeness.
Let me discover the beast underlying that thickness.
Allow me to end this madness,
Give me the honors to taste your sweetness.
Let my hands read your body like braille
I dont need my eye sight when I got my hands to explore the sensual narratives on your skin.
Reigniting the fire inside of you.
You are very fascinating….a mysterious species which I intend to study like an archeologist.
Just let me tease your body like an acoustic guitarist
playing a fine tune,
those eyes of yours are like a window
Let me peaked through just to see what lies beneath your shyness.
I dont mind getting lost into those eyes once again.
Lets go wherever nature lead us.
Your undying scent you left behind forever haunts me.
I still ache for your presence.
Save me from this dreadful place,
Something far more deeply is engraved through your face.
This wild ecstacy of our secret union shall lead us to a better place.
Allow me to deal with all the injustice of your past experiences.
I am not just an ordinary man.
I am an exclusive design of my maker.
My existence is very profound.
Allow me to drink water from your stream of intimacy.
Im dying of thirst.
Relax…..let me massage all your stiff muscles.
Dont think too much….just relax.
Im fully at your service.
Your are quite an adventure,
I’d like to discover all your hidden treasures.
Just let me….I promise to be tender.
Trapped within my comfort zone
Blinded by the fluidity of my personality
Pressured by my own expectations
my fearspulls me backward
instead of pushing me forward
In the middle of nowhere, somewhere
Relinquish with hatred
Comforted by numbness,
Heart pumping blood of melancholy
Taken back by his ignorance
Disgusted by his pretence
Hate cannot explain the resentment I feel for him
His presence is overdressed with so much agony
I don’t know whether I could forgive him.
He had become a repressed memory I do not want to remember nor bring out through the unconscious
If I had a pistol manufactured by intelligent men who knows how to hypnotise a person into believing that there’s no purpose of living.
I am wounded by his persistence towards making me angry
Forcing me to confront the beast that lives inside me
I thought I have put it to sleep
You get the pleasure from dictating my emotions
Adorning my soul with bitterness.
Deceived to believe that I am in charge
Unfiltered thoughts of hostility torture me
Take away my inner peace.
Oh God teach us to forgive those who hurt us
They do not know what they are doing.
I stood there motionless
Looking through open spaces,
wondering about that one unforgettable face
A face that brought up deep, wounded, painful mempries.
Dealing with the what ifs, maybes, only ifs
I realised that it was too late
I cannot not stop, pause for a moment.
I carried on reliving the past.
The chaotic, disturbing, bitter feelings are still locked in my heart.
Blamed everyone for my own mistakes,
My nind is clustered with unpleasant thoughts
Pushing me afar…alienating myself from reality.
My own numbness drugged me to sleep
Portrayed a strong character while I was slowly dying inside.
Troubled by this familiar face which suddenly lock me up in the darkness
causing me to have endless nightmares,
Remembering everything he has done
The pain he left behind
Left me broken, forced me to build a wall around myself
Thank you for making me feel so alive,
remembering the agonizing thoughts of yesterday,
teaching me to embrace all the shortcomings that comes with life,
Everything I thought I knew about you it had faded away like a repressed thought,
You had become an unattended event of the past,
Shared a rehearsed conversation to hide our true feelings,
our superficial fronts follows us like haunted ghost
wrapped with unbearable desires
yet we shut ourselves out of the lustful cocoons
memories we have created are not forgetful dreams
Only if I can hear the liberating melody of my beating heart,
I will understand the message from that one last kiss you gave me
interwoven with good farewells,
promising all the best for the lonely journey we chose to embark…
A kiss which imprint my soul with forbidden pleasures,
slowly evoking the wickedness that lies behind those eyes of yours,
Sinful pleasures that promise to quench my thirst for love,
searching for the truth inside your lies,
tension caving in, building a wall between us.
making us known strangers
exiled by our egos,
Seeking new ways to heal the pain
Your silence overflows with profound revelations.
Now I truly understand why you were part of my past not my future,
you were an obstacle which deprived me to reach my full potential.
BUT NOW I HAVE LET YOU GO
I am more than happy
I am free….
Can the past predetermine the future?
Why is the past keep recurring in the present?
Thoughts I’ve made peace with everything,
A single memory can exhume the wrath which is woven with worrisome feelings,
The monster always look for ways to put us on edge
superficially torture our souls with rage
forces us to alienate ourselves from reality
putting us in an utopian cage
filter our lives with great pain
then make us to become slaves within our own skins
Penetrating its sweet vengeance through our wild cravings for ecstacies.
Promising to put the mind at ease
surely the process of forgiving is never easy.
Finding the root of our anger requires time
The rise of conflict imprison us with doubts,
Slowly undressing our ego,leaving our bare soul tto experience the coldness of melancholy which is trapped within our unconscious mind.
Instead of moving forward, we feel like we are turning backwards.
Moving back in time of cruelty
What do we do to deal with this destruction?
Clotting our purest thoughts wuth confusion
One day we shall conquer the evil notives of this monster.
Its power is depended on us
Saturated with false implications.
then we are powerful beings, we can break the walls which stop us from enjoying life to the fullest.
Time has pass, stars has fallen
The beautiful images of the sunset
Indoctrinated with the nature of the shattered dreams,
Lingering thoughts which stir the soul with great bitterness,
Deeply rooted with doubts,confusion,unpleasant thoughts which pushes humanity afar,
Accused of commiting a crime by just being different
Beginning to question their intelligence
Perceive their own brothers as enemies
Losing the essence of their deeply rooted culture
The sacredness of their culture being put on scale
Rated the lowest, classified as inferior
Who invited the beast to the feast?
He lacks the original cultural beliefs
His presence is surrounded by so much darkness
Tainted our purest minds with useless assumptions
Look where it got us…nowhere
Silence our kindness with foreign objects
Considered to nake our lives easier
Taking everything we owned
Yet he forgets that the scars will forever remain in our hearts and soul
Forever reminding us about our greatness
A remembrance which is engraved within our historical moments.
Our own stories.African stories
Let us sing the soung of peace
Forgive the wanderer(stranger) who sufferes fron a low self-esteem.
constantly seeking new ways to feed his appetite of being superior
Haunted by his own demons
Searching for a place to belong
Disturbed by unjustified beliefs
Do not laugh or mock another man foolishness
Kindly show him the right way as he was lost in the jungle surrounded by will animals.
Only his purest mind will save him.
His loss is not to be celebrated but to be used a learning experience
thus his courage deserve all the credit.