I wish I was a bird.

Birds cannot be caged for too long. They need to engage with the outside world for survival purposes. They have wings. Therefore, wings gives them the reason to fly. I know that some of you would argue that some birds don’t fly. It is worth noting that this piece of narration only consider the birds which can only fly. Flying is part of their DNA, they cannot deny the gift they have been given by God. Flying is their unique identity and it is part of their reality. I wish I was a bird. I just want to fly freely through the air, allow the air to fill my lungs, look at the world from above, appreciate the view from the upper glimpse and just get a different view for a change but I guess I cannot be a bird, I am only just a human being. Pulled down by the force of gravity and seeing the world around me from the below angle. Lately; no…..for so long I have been feeling like a caged bird. Locked around steel bars and seeing only what is placed in front of me. I couldn’t see what lies beyond the sun rays lighting up my room during the day, I couldn’t feel the chilly breeze of the late afternoon and I couldn’t see the face of the person who had placed me behind these bars. The only memory I have of him, is his scent which covered the room during feeding hours and the shadow which quickly faded through the walls during the night. I remained blinded for years. Until I decided to push myself, challenge myself even further by actually studying the unknown shadow which kept visiting me. I allowed change to torture me. As painful as it feels; I began to be actively involved in the activities happening around me. I absorbed everything and also questioned everything. This decision led me to discover so many things. Things which remained hidden for such a long time. The revelation began when I looked at my own reflection on the mirror and asked myself one question: IS IT WORTH IT? Time and time again I tried convincing
myself that the discovery journey will be less painful and remorseful if I push myself harder. Again, all of this could end if I get my freedom. I realised that I needed to break free from the cage I have been held in. This could only be achieved if I opened old wounds, revisit past memories and open doors that have been locked for such a long time. Therefore, I approached the shadow which haunted me for years. I kindly asked him to let me go, to give me the keys. Ohh hell yeah…. He was surprised that now I have the confidence to ask him because he believed that he owned me like some kind of private property. I wouldn’t survive without him but he was wrong. He didn’t know the real me so he tossed the keys to the floor, I unlocked myself out. Then I was free. You would assume that I was happy to finally get my freedom. Honestly I was happy until I found out that there’s a price to pay after I got my freedom.

I will tell you about it…someday.

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I wish I was a bird.

Birds cannot be caged for too long. They need to engage with the outside world for survival purposes. They have wings. Therefore, wings gives them the reason to fly. I know that some of you would argue that some birds don’t fly. It is worth noting that this piece of narration only consider the birds which can only fly. Flying is part of their DNA, they cannot deny the gift they have been given by God. Flying is their unique identity and it is part of their reality. I wish I was a bird. I just want to fly freely through the air, allow the air to fill my lungs, look at the world from above, appreciate the view from the upper glimpse and just get a different view for a change but I guess I cannot be a bird, I am only just a human being. Pulled down by the force of gravity and seeing the world around me from the below angle. Lately; no…..for so long I have been feeling like a caged bird. Locked around steel bars and seeing only what is placed in front of me. I couldn’t see what lies beyond the sun rays lighting up my room during the day, I couldn’t feel the chilly breeze of the late afternoon and I couldn’t see the face of the person who had placed me behind these bars. The only memory I have of him, is his scent which covered the room during feeding hours and the shadow which quickly faded through the walls during the night. I remained blinded for years. Until I decided to push myself, challenge myself even further by actually studying the unknown shadow which kept visiting me. I allowed change to torture me. As painful as it feels; I began to be actively involved in the activities happening around me. I absorbed everything and also questioned everything. This decision led me to discover so many things. Things which remained hidden for such a long time. The revelation began when I looked at my own reflection on the mirror and asked myself one question: IS IT WORTH IT? Time and time again I tried convincing
myself that the discovery journey will be less painful and remorseful if I push myself harder. Again, all of this could end if I get my freedom. I realised that I needed to break free from the cage I have been held in. This could only be achieved if I opened old wounds, revisit past memories and open doors that have been locked for such a long time. Therefore, I approached the shadow which haunted me for years. I kindly asked him to let me go, to give me the keys. Ohh hell yeah…. He was surprised that now I have the confidence to ask him because he believed that he owned me like some kind of private property. I wouldn’t survive without him but he was wrong. He didn’t know the real me so he tossed the keys to the floor, I unlocked myself out. Then I was free. You would assume that I was happy to finally get my freedom. Honestly I was happy until I found out that there’s a price to pay after I got my freedom.

I will tell you about it…someday.

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We tried to love but didn’t succeed

All the times we tried to love each other and didn’t succeed.

Cluster of thoughts.
Disconnected feelings
Mind in constant struggle
The heart keeps on forgiving.
Afraid to say what needs to be said.
Dressed the truth with ignorance
Hoping that silence will give me solace
I just cant hold my tongue for too long
My lips quiver with hidden secrets
Concealed with a sad song of my rebellious nature.
Today I woke with an appetite to taunt your ego.
changed all the locks to prevent you from doing further damage.
I cant stand your toxic greed and intrusion anymore.
Im done living behind the veil of your masquerading hypocrisy love.
The beast inside me has been unleashed.
Go ahead…you have paid all your dues
I shall carry you in my spirit.
Cherish all the memories.
Kill you with silence
Bury you with only my words
I have packed all your suitcases with love.
When you walk out that door
Always remember we tried to love but didnt succeed.

P.S. I love you
Goodbye.

Yours truly
The Whisperer

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Quote of the day No.1

How can I write your name in the sky when you broke my wing?

Im dragged down by your gravity of deceptions and hate.

You like it when Im on the ground.

Though you have taken some part of me.

You didn’t take away my heart.

broken_heart1

Stand Accused

Stand accused within the strangeness of my own skin,
Inflicted with troubling thought that sought to kill the sedate feeling locked inside,
Addicted to a pill that takes away my patience,
Standing in the pathway, waiting to attack the beast with sweet love pretence,
The pill sedate my soul with hostility
I stand accused in the middle of nowhere…
Locked within the iron cage with the pain I cannot bear,
Rest easy upon the realness of my scars hidden, trapped inside my heart.
He assume that I am fine with everything
His presence makes me cold and bitter,
He is playing a dangerous game with the devil
Though he is a God fearing man
Hope that his prayers protect his soul because he failed to honour his part of the deal,
The strangeness of my own being soothe the guilt trip which burden my serenity with heartache,
Voices that echoes within the night intend to keep me restless,
He carry on with his mission…attacking when I am vulnerable
Torturing my innocence with hostility.
Hatred is his closet friend
He is brutalised with pretence
Do you realised the damage you have done
You have sucked my free spirited soul so dry
Left me in the dark,
Battered with empty words
Felt useless and distance from reality.
His abiding indifference will help him find peace in his grave of infidelities
He claims he knows what I really need
Then again he is just a reckless player in a chess game
He allows his opponent to learn his next move,
He is foolish…its absurd to think that he can ne moral
Let his shortcomings flourish and comfort him through his unknown journey.
I stand accused of the crime I didn’t commit
Gave a defence which is entrenched with the truthfulness of his dealings
Yet the fear of challenging him scares me
Someone will get hurt when I start unpacking his luggage of secrecy
His true nature will remain unknown because I chose to die with his secrets
Let him get judged by his own God…not me

WAR

We are at war,
Armoured with only our voices,
A pen and paper our only weapon
Writing our stories,
Stories which will forever remain
within the heart that listen
We are artist,
Artist who paints pictures of reality
Just look closely
Allow your eyes to see the ugly truth that lies within.
Cultivating the soul with all beautiful things.
The picture holds no sympathy
It reveals its ruthless nature unconsciuosly
reflecting the complexity of the critical mind.
The artist doesn’t care about being admired
he only cares about sustaining the reality of his craft.
he is the Soldier
fighting an endless battle
a battle that has no victory
yet its occurrence is satisfactory
It had occurred for long time
taken everything I thought it was mine
made him innocent like a child
he do not know when it began
All he remember is the beautiful sun
The sun that exposed him unto his enemies
leaving them helpless
His craft is heartless
So much blood had been shed
Lots of lesson had been learnt
Inspiring strangers had been met
And he doesn’t feel reluctant to call them friends
They are his family which he never had…
They are his revelation he never anticipated
His words left him uneasy
leaving him in great suffocation
Pleading to find redemption
Then feeding his hunger with great expectations.

I am a mess

Doing no good when I put myself in a standard
Limitations are the source of dissatisfaction,
Putting myself in little boxes
When the world begins to exercise their comparison games,
with hate…
The heart is troubled, making the migraine unbearable,
imprison my free-spirited inner self
Showing the society what they ought to see.
Never saw a prophet whose younger like me.
painting pictures with words,
dying inside becomes a tendency.
Being late to realize that the truth shall set us free.
Experts establish an emotional connection
making the world believe they’ve got all the answers.
being pushed away,lost count of the battles I’ve fought in my lifetime.
Telling another woman’s son that I cannot live without.
In the meanwhile I’m holding the keys to the house.
He always been a guest.
Gave him everything, fulfilled his requests.
never realized,I was wasting time,
trying to please a heart of another man,
mine tormented with self hatred,confusion stood on my way.
Told him to get out while his scent chose to stay.
Feeling tempted to give him a call,
Realized he doesn’t deserve it.
Let silence be his keeper,
help him to grow, make up his mind
know what he wants.
I’m a mes like him
My troubles are keeping me restless.
NO matter how long it will take me
I shall rise above this bitterness.

What if I kissed you….?

Eyes looking,
Hands touching,
My mind thinking,
Wondering whether this was just a dream,
Felt my heart racing, pounding creating sweet melodies
Lips locked together telling an unforgettable story,
Being held closely to feel your warmth
With you, my love, I tend to lose control.
These sensational feeling buried inside makes me wonder…
Wonder how it could be if you were locked inside me
Having a passionate time together,
Wishing that moment to last forever.

Longing to give each other eternal satisfaction,
By the near future, it could be our greatest celebration,
You become a tree holding me tight on your branches, keeping me warm
Feeling these tenderness that grew inside me,
Having unlimited questions in my mind
Assured myself that this relation was built on lies, lust
The heart longing to be beside him,
Giving him a long passionate kiss-
Begging him to unleash my potential as he please
Our body gestures creating a lovely rhythm
Stillness of time blinds me,
The exploring part begins,
It wasn’t easy as it seems,
Took me places I’d never been,
Showed me images I’d never seen, while crawling inside me.
Making me feel the emotions I’d never feel.

It was imperative to leave him,
Though my parting soul troubled me,
His hands touched me, rose my body heat,
For this dodgy game I thought I was unfit
Yet I enjoyed every part of it.
Whether we decided to walk on the street of Manhattans
The O’Jays still yearn to caught the sight of us
Both the song we sing is rated platinum
Using our smiles to plug in the truth to hide
Ignoring the sound made by our pounding hearts
Your closure makes me high,
Though I’m a non-smoker-
I see you through the smoke of our love-
Never prepared to go on rehab,
Just enjoying my addiction.