Im overwhelmed by the deep sited desire
The desire to dig deeper into your mind,body and soul.
What makes you tickle?
I want to know you better
You’re such a fascinating soul.
A mystery waiting to be exposed.
Tired of chasing your shadow
I want to know the real you.
Yet Im tormented by the fear to get closer
The ravenous hunger to love propels me to endure flames,
The burning passion that I see through your eyes
I am shunned for not speaking the truth
Remembering all private vacations I took when I was thinking about you.
My suitcase full of untold tales
heavy burden,packed neatly to hide the lonesome of my bleedibg heart
the chaotic scenes taking over my thought process
Chose to sit in silence
Admire you from a distance
Toy with your thoughts with pretence
Our ignorance offer sanity,
Again, our ego shall grant us the company we need.
P-passion resolved at its peak.
I-ineffable connection exposed by our warm bodies.
L-love leading us to discover our sense of self
L-longed moments,lips locked,bonded soul
O-only you understand this emotional exchange
W-wonderfully intertwined by the burning sensatiom of intimacy
T-tell me heart soothing tales of your upbringing
A-answering all the questions I had about your strange personality.
L-let me listen to your beating heart.
K-kiss me passionately,keep me interested until the next session take place
Just stay there
You are a memory to be forgotten.
A forlorn depiction hanging on a wall.
stood still with so much life
Dead through the eyes of the ignorant
Burning vigorously with an invisible passion.
Hiding the lonesome celebration of our hearts.
Supressing any stimulus which might led us to remember.
All the pleasant moments we shared.
Dont you dare say another word?
The sound of your voice carries a dark spell.
It is a destruction
It is my weakness
Will you trade your everyday occupation for being a mute actor?
Let my eyes do the admiring
Let my hands do the inspection
You are such a beautiful artistic being I would like to study
Let me first speak to your creator.
Then I will learn how to deal with you.
What you have become is not learnt from any books. It is that sacred,distinct lesson learnt from all the scars,heartache and bitter sweet memories of your life.
All the times we tried to love each other and didn’t succeed.
Cluster of thoughts.
Mind in constant struggle
The heart keeps on forgiving.
Afraid to say what needs to be said.
Dressed the truth with ignorance
Hoping that silence will give me solace
I just cant hold my tongue for too long
My lips quiver with hidden secrets
Concealed with a sad song of my rebellious nature.
Today I woke with an appetite to taunt your ego.
changed all the locks to prevent you from doing further damage.
I cant stand your toxic greed and intrusion anymore.
Im done living behind the veil of your masquerading hypocrisy love.
The beast inside me has been unleashed.
Go ahead…you have paid all your dues
I shall carry you in my spirit.
Cherish all the memories.
Kill you with silence
Bury you with only my words
I have packed all your suitcases with love.
When you walk out that door
Always remember we tried to love but didnt succeed.
P.S. I love you
We are singing the same song but with different tunes.
You are right here with me but your mind seems so far away.
How do we move forward when the picture stands still
Incarcerated by words left unsaid
Hidden behind the veil of our superficial love
Are you prepared to break all the walls?
Open up the casket of my wrong deeds
Damn…you!!! You are not perfect nor a saint
The irony of our relation haunts me
Smeared around with color and pattern like graffiti on the wall
Theres no formula nor equation that can solve the problems we are facing
All I need from you is to rescue me
Im drowning deeper and deeper into the drench of confusion
Im being swayed to and fro like the waves in the sea
The rocking chair will not put me to sleep
The uncertainty of the love we share comes crashing through the cracks of these walls around me.
Safeguarding the unknown with meaningless inclinations.
What are we really fighting for?
We are restless like the shore
Seeking peace and comfort in crowded spaces
Failed on the first attempt but Im not giving up
The battlefield is taking all my strength.
Exposing my vulnerability to the master of the truth.
Tired of searching for treasures that are not rightfully mine.
Im grateful for every little thing I have in my life.
I have freed myself from the prison of possessiveness.
Greed is a senseless conviction of ungratefulness
Takes away the real essence of happiness.
Consumed by insecurities.
Do not ask me to go back where it all began
Recollecting those memories we once shared
Leaving behind bitter sweet feelings of our lonely hearts.
Only the truth can save us
It start with I….and it shall end with US only if you are ready.
I struggled a lot to finish writing this poem. There’s lot going on in my life. I wish I could express the exact feelings but the fear of opening up those old wounds makes me anxious. I guess this a price you pay if you are a broken writer who seek comfort in chaotic spaces.
I have left my doors open.
Cold wind sneaking in like a mice.
Carrying the gift of peace and distraction.
I have forgotten your warm embrace
Your charming smile.
You are just a faceless beast
Consumed with an appetite of my blood.
He carved his claws on my flesh
Awakening the deep sited desire of my fantasies.
Captivated by his luring spell
Fabricated underneath the sheet of deception.
Your pleasant scent that lingers through the room
Slowly fades away when you go back to live your other life.
Don’t beg me to conceal all the scars you have left on my skin.
There are sacred portrayals of our moments
An omen of what is meant to be….
In this particular love and war union.
I chose to love you with all your imperfections.
Behind closed doors…pleasure escalates to the peak
We indulge in cardiovascular activities.
Body sweating…heated bodies.
Commanding us to submit to the language of motion
Enslaved with deep darkest longings.
We danced to our own music
Sadly our wildest dream carries the burden of the past
Disguising the present with lies
Denying that the dark shadow of our bitter sweet secrets will haunt us in the future.
Somewhere between the past and the present.
Rests memories of broken promises, deceit and disappointments.
Deep darkest secrets and events that occured behind closed doors.
Laughter which echoes with melancholy rumbles.
Watchful eyes looking for hidden agendas.
Waiting for the prophecy of back stabbing to unfold.
Most definitely we are animals.
We are confronted with insecurities of our making.
The discomfort to witness the stimuli keeps the beast on the leash.
Truth be told.
The mutual interest built with nothing but hostility.
Suffocating the rationality of breaking all the ties.
Crashing down the intended deal.
Leaving behind a sweet taste of vengeance.
Karma arrived early.
I should probably thank you for being the wild one.
However you were nothing but a dream.
I am wide awake….your time has ended.
You only exist through the darkness
Thus you cannot be recognised explicitly
You will remain obscure like a graffiti painting on the wall.
P.S. Thank you.
I love what I have become.
A proud young black woman.
Curious, loving, kind,respectful,grateful and thankful for every life experiences which keeps knocking on my door everyday. Im learning.
I am a wild animal,
I dont conform to pure humanistic sanity.
Im manifested with a great killer instinct.
I will lured you to my space.
Curse your existence behind my smiling face.
Wait patiently for you to give in.
Allow the forces of attraction to take over.
Then feed my inner monster with your flesh.
I find great pleasure from your misconception about me.
I am a broken soul, I dont want you to amend my broken pieces.
Let them scatter around
The disconnections of my persona makes the game more exciting.
If you gave yourself time to reveal the underlying truth beneath the surface
You wouldn’t fell too deep into the trap of my deceptions.
Never assume that you understand what you see.
My true reflection doesn’t require only your eye sight.
All you human senses needs to work simultaneously.
You need to dig a little deeper,don’t become a passenger in my cruise.
Become part of the experience, explore other horizons.
Do not just accept the menu catered to you.
Ask the chef to prepare your favourite cuisine.
I am a corrupted soul, I dont understand the formalities of being normally accepted.
I speak a dead language understood by a minority.
I am an invisible shadow, a mask which performs only at night.
I dont need any audience, the loneliness whispers the song of staying alert.
You were too quick to assume that you understood my multi-layered personality
My ambivalent nature, there’s no psychological intervention which can diagnose me.
I am shameless to admit that I am a poisonous wicked soul.
My unsettling words silently put a bullet through your brain.
A hyperdemic needle which subliminally get through your veins
Injecting a non deadly venom which keeps you sedated.
Making you to dance on my tune.
Unaware because you are too absorb in your ego.
Its a pity that keeps begging for more.
And I keep captivating you with a toxic affair.